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Write Your Story – Create the Reality You Want

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I could ask you if you ever suffer from some type of anxiety, but that would be like asking do you ever breathe.

It’s part of the human condition to have anxiety. It’s actually part of the animal life to have anxiety. It’s a survival feature.

But for us humans in modern life, we can sometimes take this to extremes experiencing anxiety in all sorts of situations – sometimes consciously (going for a job interview) and a lot of the time unconsciously (like being in an elevator with strangers).

Anxiety is normal, but we make it detrimental by the labels we use, the meaning we assign to things and situations, and the stories we tell ourselves about our life.

As an example:

If I have an ache somewhere in my body, it can be seen as good, neutral, or bad all depending on the meaning I assign to that sensation.

Do I see it as my body doing the job of healing, say a bruise – “good job body!”

Do I see it as I would a fly – just a mild nuisance to be ignored.

Or do I see it as something mysteriously sinister with eventual catastrophic consequences. “What if it’s some dread disease (insert the latest horrible one you’ve heard a story of recently) and I will eventually die from it??!! Ahh”

Sometimes we actually do have a disease. When this happens we often slip into thinking of it as a fixed thing.  But the truth is that our bodies are forever in a state of change, evolving, repairing, healing. Whatever disease we have is part of a large pattern in our body and mind. It takes maintaining to keep it as it is. But it is always possible for the pattern to be changed and for you to experience a different level of health.

There is nothing that is so fixed that it won’t change over time. (Even mountains crumble away and continents move over time) This also includes other aspects of your life beyond health – relationships, state of mind, quality of life experiences, career, etc.

Some things can take a fair amount of time to change, but it’s never too late to change your patterns.

Here’s how to begin to change your patterns and change your life.

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Love Bath

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Do you ever criticize yourself? That’s kind of a dumb question.

The better question is how much do you criticize yourself? I was at a store the other day and the cashier made an error ringing something in. It was no big deal, just a little typo. It was easily fixed. But I noticed she said out loud “I can’t do anything with these fat fingers,” and it instantly made me aware of all those little thoughts I/we say to ourselves all day.

It’s likely so prevalent, happening even just below our conscious thought that we barely notice it. You may notice it more when looking in a mirror though, when you are consciously reviewing your appearance.

The bottom line is that this is no way to live our lives. Our beauty is not our body. Our beauty is our love and our kindness. And regardless of our appearance in any given moment, we are deserving of the highest and most unconditional love all the time.

Here’s how to get that love, and how to really feel it in your life.

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Hear the Message the Universe is Telling You

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Sometimes we are hit with sickness, a bad night’s sleep, a roadblock at work or maybe even an actual roadblock. Our first instinct is to get frustrated and think “ugh! Why?” But often we don’t truly listen for the answer. But if you slow down, you can get that answer.

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Create Your Beautiful Life

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All of life is creation. And your life is your creation. You create it every moment of every day with your thoughts. Like crocheting a shawl or creating anything you start with a vision, you maintain focus, and you do the work of creating.

Your life is no different. Do you want a different life?

Start with your vision. Change your vision, change what you think is possible, change your beliefs. You create your reality.

What do you want to be true? Continue Reading →

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Simple Trick to Get Out of the Mud

photo credit Josh Houghtelin

Are you trying to accomplish your goals, but, alas, you have a problem? Maybe you’re frustrated or angry about something. Perhaps motivation is nowhere to be found. Do you feel like you just can’t move forward? We all have those days (or months). For most of us we get tripped up by focusing on the problem, frustration, and feelings that are keeping us stuck in the mud. There’s a simple solution to get traction again. Ready for it? Click to read more. Continue Reading →

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What to Do When Chaos Strikes

What to do when chaos strikes

Sometimes, well, let’s face it, a lot of the time, things don’t go according to our master plan. It could be our plan for the day, for our long-awaited vacation, or simply in the parking lot looking for a place to park.

When things go wrong we have 2 basic choices:

Be calm or get upset.

We can laugh or cry.

We can see it as an interruption in our life or as something that was supposed to be in our life at that exact moment for reasons we may or may not know now or ever. The reason is not important. Let’s take a look at why the calm reaction is a good habit to form and how to do it. Continue Reading →

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Who Says?

Who says we can only love certain parts of our body?

Who says I can love some parts of my body because they are soft and giggly, but I shouldn’t love other parts because they are soft and giggly?

Who says I can only love parts of my body if they are skinny, flat, round, or muscular?

Who says I am too skinny, too voluptuous, too muscular, not muscular enough?

Who says I must have a certain face, certain skills, certain possessions to be allowed to experience happiness on a daily basis, on a moment by moment basis?

Who says I can only love myself when I achieve perfection, when I have no sins, when I operate at peak productive deficiency?

Who made these rules? And why do we subscribe to them?

Why do we allow them to dictate whether we’re happy or sad, feel good or bad about ourselves?

I cant think of any good reason. Can you?

Ultimately even if society made these rules, we each have the control to make our own rules.

I do know this: Life is short. We never know when our time might be up.

People who are faced with their own death usually realize with crystal clarity that rules that stifle our happiness are ridiculous and silly.

So why wait for the end of your life to realize that you wasted so much time worrying about your appearance or perfection in any area of your life? Why not decide today to love yourself and be happy. When you do this you are better able to love others and experience a rich life.

We have two basic choices when it comes to self acceptance: to accept ourselves unconditionally or to only accept parts of ourselves . Both choices are yours to make. But one of these will give you a good quality of life and the other will limit you and your happiness.

This is not to say that you won’t have times of challenge with regards to your self image, but that after you passed through those challenging emotions you are left with a simple choice.

Would you like to feel happy and good about yourself, or not?

So how do we choose unconditional self acceptance?

What are the action steps? Let’s take a look at that now.

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Find the Good, Find the Magical


In this life we find what we are looking for. There is enough good, bad, magical, and mundane to find exactly what you are looking for. So why not look for the good?

What you focus on determines your mood, the quality of your experiences, and the quality of your life. Our brains have a natural tendency to focus on negative things. This is a survival mechanism that’s left over from long ago, but for the most part we don’t need it today and we certainly overuse it.

Would you like to know how you can change your life for the better? See how easy it is to change your focus and make this happen. Continue Reading →

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How to Stop Making Problems – Start Making Not-Problems

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I don’t know about you, but I have a little tendency (or maybe a big tendency) to take a situation and then start making problems. For example, let’s say I have a friend comes with the problem and asks for my help. I give them my advice, but I make it into a problem for me. How? I become tied to their outcome. I start worrying about whether they will take my advice are not. Will they go off the deep end? Will their problems get worse? Will they continue to have this problem? And so on.

The answer is maybe yes and maybe no. The way to make it a Not-Problem is to realize it doesn’t matter. Each person is on their own path. You can give help, advice, and love, but they must walk their own path. And you must walk yours.

Worry over future negative outcomes = “creating problems.”

Do you ever do this?

Let’s examine the simple solution to make Not-Problems.

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