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Top 10 Tips for Britney Spears and Anyone Who Is Feeling Lost in Life

Britney Spears comeback

The media has been having a field day with Britney Spears for the last few years and most especially over the last year. I’m not here to add to the gossip. I wish Britney all the best. What Britney is going through, under the media microscope, many of us also experience. We live through similar situations in our lives where we feel lost, can’t find our compass, and don’t know where to turn. When that happens there can be a lot of frantic frenzy like a puppy who’s just been let out of his crate. The puppy runs around and around, running into things, jumping up on people, and acting pretty crazy. Until he gets all his energy out. Only then is the puppy ready to listen to the guiding voice of his owner.

This happened to me a little bit in my early 20’s when, upon entering the real world, I needed to figure out where I was going. Being scared, I clung onto people, some of whom did not have my best interests at heart. I had some anxiety attacks and thought my world was caving in, when in reality, my body was trying to tell me to get some help. Over time I sought out the help of people who always loved me, my family. I learned about anxiety attacks and how harmless they really are and how easy they are to overcome.

So for Britney Spears and anyone else who feels lost, here are the things that helped me get back on track.

1. Slow Down and Stop Running Away. Trying to bury your problems underneath the pursuit of pleasure will not make them go away. Yes, you’ll feel good in the moment when you dive into chemicals, wild experiences, watching endless TV, new relationships, and sex, but every time the pleasure ends you will be right back where you started. The problems will still be there, still unresolved, and you’ll be looking for the next hedonistic experience to drown it out.

2. Let Go of Fear. If you are afraid to get off the vicious cycle described above, know that you can do it. You can handle it. Know that there is more than enough strength inside you. For many people, turning over their fear to God, a Higher Power, or to the Universe is a very powerful way to let go of fear. Another way is to imagine you are a child in your mother’s arms trusting her to take care of anything that comes along. Feel what that is like to release fear and to trust completely. Now do the same thing, but imagine being cradled by yourself. Feel and trust in your strength to handle anything in your life.

3. Let Go of the Notion That a Stormy Life is Romantic. Life is already stormy enough. You’ll have plenty of things in your life to keep it interesting. What you don’t want is factors that add unnecessary volatility to your life. Otherwise you’ll find yourself on the never ending cycle of chasing a high to heal your lows. See if you can identify what those factors are so you can begin to eliminate them one by one.

4. Return to the People Who Love You. These are the people you might be afraid will say “I told you so.” They might and they might not. Don’t worry about that. If there is any sense that someone has an agenda to exploit you then that is not the right person to go to. You want to go to the people who would be by your side when all the chips are down, when you are sick, and when you are penniless. Let your pride go and feel the relief of doing that. Go be loved. This means people who will listen to you, be with you, and support you.

5. Ask for Help. Don’t think you are burdening people. Don’t worry about people telling you “I told you so.” Don’t think you have to do work things out all on your own. Ask the people who love and support you for help. And don’t be afraid to ask a lot. Don’t worry. Pretty soon, once you’re feeling strong again, you won’t need to ask for as much help. But the good thing is you will have developed a very important habit of not being afraid to ask for help when you really need it.

6. Know Why You’re Trying to Change. Think of all the bad things in your life right now: the anxiety, the hangovers, the worry, the emotional turbulence and so on. Imagine how great life will be with all these difficulties eliminated from your life. “But,” you say, “I like the partying. I like chasing new relationships. I like the fast pace.” Changing your life doesn’t mean it will be without pleasure. It just means that you will be seeking a life that is more stable and less volatile. When you find purpose in your life and start taking care of yourself, you will have much more pleasure than you have today. You’ll still be able to laugh wildly, to do exciting things, to have fun, to have special romantic relationships, and so on. But it will all be in a way that supports a stable life. Stay focused on moving towards a better life and away from your current stormy life.

7. Find a Life Coach to Guide Your Life Planning. Purchase Anthony Robbins “Get the Edge” CD’s or Andrew Matthews tapes (my favorite self-help author) and start the fun activity of daydreaming what you want to do in your life. What is important to you? Start some life goal planning either on your own if you can or find someone who can walk you through the process. Planning your goals is fun. Go for it!

8. Take Baby Steps. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself. Change takes work and time. Go super slow. Be kind to yourself. Whenever you feel frustration emerging, remember the mantra “Go Slow.” Think about what is really important. Don’t worry about small things. Just take care of yourself. This will help break your knee-jerk reaction of diving into things that aren’t good for you whenever you are feeling low.

9. Exercise Daily. Get outside and either walk or jog everyday. Alternate listening to music and listening to your own thoughts. Use that time to enjoy nature and let go of your problems. It’s also a good time to plan solutions for your goals. Exercise makes people happier. It helps relieve anxiety. It makes you feel strong, which you are! Exercise is a great way to tap into your inner strength that is always available whenever you choose to plug into it!

10. Get Involved in Something Outside Yourself. When I was having anxiety in college, my campus job making sandwiches made me feel so good. I was too busy to worry about anything. It got my blood flowing and it stopped my brain from re-treading those worry paths over and over again. So find something to do that will keep you very busy for a period of time everyday or every other day. You could try volunteer work, a new hobby, a book club or some other social group. Just pick one and do it. And remember #5, ask for help if you need a jump getting started.

Wishing you, Britney, and all those who are going through a tough transition, much peace and success on your journey!

Please Share!

Were you ever lost? How helped you the most to get back on track? All comments big and small are very welcomed!

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31 Responses to Top 10 Tips for Britney Spears and Anyone Who Is Feeling Lost in Life

  1. Betty Carbuncle January 12, 2008 at 6:01 am #

    I voted and submitted this article to stumble upon because it’a bad bad moment for me right now and I feel esactly like britney and her stormy life which must end If i ever wanna survive and try a new experience of normal life. I know now evertthing looks bad to me, but still have to try. Thanks for the article. Betty from Italy

  2. inside weight loss January 12, 2008 at 8:55 pm #

    Of course these are all good tips. But I wonder how it is like having so much pressure from the media and such. It isnt easy to acheive those task, when everything is crashing down around you. great site by the way. Will come back for sure.

  3. meg January 13, 2008 at 4:43 am #

    somehow we go through stages in our lives very similar to this. I stumbled into a book “Who Moved My Cheese” by Dr. Spencer Johnson. It helped me a lot and it’s just an hour’s read.

  4. giovanni January 13, 2008 at 12:39 pm #

    really good, I wish too Britney much peace and success

  5. Imenik January 13, 2008 at 8:40 pm #

    Good Tips, im gonna write them down and send a letter to Miss “Whinehouse”.. maybe it could help her too, as we see in the latest close up photos of her nose…

  6. Ben January 14, 2008 at 12:24 am #

    I also agree with inside weight loss that these are good tips. I feel that Britney has really been blowtorched by the media – well the gossiping part at least.

    Having had first hand experience of post-natal/post-partum depression as a husband and father, I commented to my wife one day several months ago that I felt that there is a distinct possibilty that Britney Spears could have post-natal/post-partum depression.

    The salivating newshounds are really the last thing she needs at this time. To get help though, she has to want to get help, not have it forced upon her.

  7. WISP Tower Geek January 14, 2008 at 9:34 pm #

    #9 is so vital. Daily exercise will energize your body, restore your mind & give you fresh perspective.

    Most people underestimate physical activity severely, but it can really help someone turn their lives in the right direction.

  8. Andrew January 15, 2008 at 12:30 am #

    This is a stunning article. One of the best blog posts i have ever seen. I really do feel for Britney at the moment with everything happening to her. This advice is really good, if someone could send it to her.

    Regards Andrew

  9. Franklin January 15, 2008 at 1:15 am #

    Facing up to your problems, instead of shuffling them around, will definitely help you feel better. End of the day, it’s all about not getting in to a mess, and if you do get in to one, solving it as quickly as possible, instead of digging deeper. Believe me, I’ve been there. I was addicted to chaos. One problem after another, and all I did was run around and try to keep my head above water. You have to stop, tote up the losses and move on. And yes, faith helps.

  10. bighead January 15, 2008 at 7:11 am #

    Britney should by some crap via http://www.topshop.sk to loose some weight first and than put herself together…:)))

  11. alio January 15, 2008 at 7:00 pm #

    I really like this list. You have some things listed that I have not come across before and that feel very true.

    I especially liked #6 “Know When You’re Trying to Change”.

    Thanks for sharing!

  12. Rhei, writer Surefirewealth.com January 23, 2008 at 1:43 am #

    Everyone deserves a second chance.

    For me, a good way to change one’s life is to trust God that He’s on your side on every step that you take and perceive things positively. And if you successfully incorporate this in your life, everything will surely follow or flow correctly. You have to believe that you’re strong to face those obstacles and pretty strong enough to solve it by yourself or through the help of others. Seeking assistance from others is one way to achieve change; they can guide you and can teach you to have a better life. Through this, you can plan your life on how you wanted it to be and you can take baby steps to reach your goals. By this, you can see life the way you never seen it before.

  13. Orillius January 29, 2008 at 5:59 pm #

    I think for many people it starts with not loving yourself enough! If you don`t like who you are as a person you tend to look for outlets and end up doing really bad and stupid things. People should spend more time working on theselves as people.

    Zig Ziglar once said don`t goo looking for friends – instead go looking to be a friend.

    You`ll end up with alot of friends as a result and because you were a friend – you`ll like yourself alot more!

  14. Jim Mirkalami February 7, 2008 at 5:29 pm #

    I have been coming to this site a lot lately, so i thought would be proper to leave a note of appreciation here.

    Thanks,
    Jim Mirkalami

  15. http://randomstuffsite.com February 12, 2008 at 9:33 pm #

    That’s some good advice for Britney Spears. http://randomstuffsite.com

  16. Free Britney Spears Videos March 4, 2008 at 9:29 pm #

    The worst part about her is that she is hurting the people around her too, like her sister and kids.

  17. mac March 5, 2008 at 1:08 pm #

    I like Britney spears, and i feel sad on everything that has happened to her lately. I wish a very good year to britney, and hope she will be back on her feet in no time.

  18. Loskas June 5, 2008 at 6:22 am #

    Heh, I love the title. And I love this post. Thanks.

  19. Kate June 16, 2008 at 12:17 pm #

    I’m stuck at a junction where nothing seems to be going well for me, more like a mid life crisis… I’m going to work on the first two points.. as baby steps..

    Thank you!
    Katelyn-Anne

  20. luggage July 5, 2008 at 7:22 am #

    Interesting advice, although I’m not sure if the advice about ‘being cradled by yourself’ really helps. I mean, you’re the one who’s panicking. It’s a little unrealistic to be cradled by yourself when, in fact, yourself is the one who doesn’t know what to do. I’ll have to think about it for a while, but I’m not sure if it’s the best thing to tell someone who can’t see the forest for the trees.

  21. agentsully July 9, 2008 at 8:50 pm #

    @luggage – true, not easy, but worth giving it a try. It can take some imagination to work. Good luck! And thanks for commenting.

  22. Wild Britney September 14, 2008 at 9:07 am #

    Britney is doing much better now. Best of luck to her.

  23. April Bowlby September 21, 2008 at 12:35 pm #

    Every one will have this kind of situation in their lives but being a strong and confident person can over come all these problems.

    Great blog for everybody to improve confidence.

  24. agentsully October 2, 2008 at 6:13 pm #

    @Wild Britney – indeed! I totally agree. Wishing her all the best.

  25. Product Reviews November 28, 2008 at 6:57 pm #

    I don\’t normally leave comments! But what you said here makes one think! Would you mind if I placed a link back from my blog?

  26. Blind Panic June 5, 2009 at 7:29 pm #

    Here’s a good one, I am so fired up I haven’t checked to see if it’s already been said:

    Don’t teach your child to hate herself or her natural impulses, especially those which you hate and deny in yourself. There’s a name for this: criminal hypocrisy. When my dad passes on, I will laugh and have a party. (sorry to say that.) That’s not normal, is it?

    • agentsully June 6, 2009 at 10:46 am #

      @Blind Panic – no judging here. Our relationships with our parents can be tricky at times. I wish you peace in all things.

  27. Blind Panic June 5, 2009 at 7:32 pm #

    To the administrator,

    please forgive me, comment 28 was meant for the article “How Can I Teach My Child to Be a Good and Happy Person?”.

    I know it’s a horrible comment, but I would be grateful if you allow it.

  28. Maurice Lagrone August 15, 2010 at 6:47 pm #

    I love Britney’s music a lot and i like the new track rader and i love so much that i can not stop playing it all the time.

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